A kick in the butt

 So obviously, I stalled on streaking, again...

It was probably silly to start the streak the week I was getting my first Covid-19 vaccination, but I'm an eternal optimist, right? Anyway, I let that derail me mostly out of anxiety more than any actual side effects or inability to sit down and write. That's a relief in that I had no discernable side effects other than fatigue, but it's a disappointment that I continue to let life dictate and derail my writing.

I've come to realize that my entire life is governed by emotional responses to what might happen. Rather than being resolute, I make a lot of decisions based on my own projections and fears. Rather than take control, I worry and let the endless possible bad outcomes alter my thinking and actions. In writing, that's called critical voice, but the truth is, we all have a little nagging voice that worries and tries to keep us safe. 

What if it's hot? What if I fail? What if I die? 

That voice in our head is there for a reason, and the reason is, our brain prefers as little stress as possible. It guides us towards the path of least resistance if we let it. Unfortunately, that voice is in direct opposition to our own growth potential as humans. If we listen to it too much, we stop growing entirely.

Yeah, I listen to it way too much.

Despite that, though, I keep coming back and trying. 

I signed up for a workshop with a writer I admire, Dean Wesley Smith, about a month ago, and just completed the week three coursework. The workshop has definitely made me think about why I have so much trouble staying consistent with writing, and has made me realize that there are many more ways for the Critical Voice inside me to keep me out of the writing chair and full of worry and doubt than I could have imagined. In essence, what people call writer's block is just their critical voice being hyperactive, an winning the battle against actually writing. I even see now why folks like George R. Martin and Patrick Rothfuss have had a terrible time finishing (starting?) the books that everyone is waiting for!

Anyway, the workshop, combined with my recent entry to the NYCMidnight Short Story Contest, helped me see something clearly - I write well under pressure, which is to say, with a deadline. I don't mean the quality of my writing improves. What I mean is, I have an easier time getting in the chair when I'm under the influence of some outside accountability. In the case of the Contest, I had clear deadlines, and I met them. Just like handing in my homework, I always found ways to make the time to do the work and get it in on time.

So, I decided to take matters out of my own hands and signed up for three distinct challenge workshops that happen to coincide with what I want out of my writing for the next twelve months. Starting in May, I've signed up for both the Great Short Story Challenge and the Great Novel Challenge over at WMG Publishing. Then, in June, I signed up for the Great Publishing Challenge.

What does all that mean?

Every week, I have to write a short story and turn it in by Sunday at midnight.

Every two months, I have to write a novel and turn it in by the end of the second month.

And, starting in June, every month I have to publish something, either a novel, or a collection of five or more short stories, and send in the link. In addition, I get better rewards if I send in a print copy of the book, which I plan on doing once I figure out how.

So basically, for the next twelve months, I have to act the part of a professional writer. I have to write a lot, I have to learn how to publish what I write (formatting, covers, sales copy, learning copyright, learning how to get my books in online stores, learning how to get my books in print and into book stores, etc.), and I have to learn how not to stop. Ever.

The reward for that is a lifetime subscription to pretty much every course WMG publishing offers, which is a lot and a huge continuing education for any writer. 

But the bigger reward is that at the end of the twelve month period, I'll have written at least 52 short stories, at least six novels, and published at least twelve books. I plan on publishing everything, and hopefully writing even more than that, but even if all I do is meet the bare minimums, I'll have had an incredibly productive year as a writer, have a ton of my work out in the word and for sale earning money, and will have learned more in twelve months than I have in the last forty years about writing for a living.

All while keeping my day job.

It's going to be tough, but I know it will be worth it.

Alright, breakfast is getting cold.

See you tomorrow.

Quick streak update before bed

 Good evening. Just a short entry to follow up on this morning's goal setting. I had a drag of a day at work, came home tired, had some dinner, watched some of the Yankee game, and thought the whole time about the writing streak. Finally, at just after 9 p.m., I sat down, opened up my laptop, put on my headphones, and started writing the new story. An hour later, I have just over 1100 words done and am on my way.

So the streak stands at 2 days of writing, 2 days of blogging. Technically, I've written creatively four days in a row now, since I wrote the contest story Friday night and wrote the first assignment for the Killing the Critical Voice class I'm taking with dean Wesley Smith, but that wasn't really a story, so I won't count it as a streak from Friday. Two days.

It's a start.

See you tomorrow.

A morning blog for a change - time to get streaky!

I'm sitting here at the writing desk thinking about the short story I want to start, and I'm struggling. My brain is telling me to relax and read this morning, and save the writing for tonight after work. It's an age-old struggle, man versus himself, and this morning my procrastination voice is particularly strong. 

I'd guess that's because I spent three hours last night writing the contest story, and my "free time" monitor is going haywire. There's this part of my brain that resents anything that resembles work when I'm on my own time. It's a terrible influence on me, and if I let it get the best of me it will be three months before I know what happened and I'll be back here posting another restart blog. I'm tired of doing that, so instead of giving in to the lazy bastard that lives in my brain, I figured I'd jump on a different task - blogging.

I very much want to start both a blogging streak and a creative writing streak. Yesterday would be day one for both, so I'm going to openly setting my goal here.

Goal: Starting yesterday, I will write and post a blog every day, write at least 1000 words creatively every day, and count the streak for both.

There, goal set. I'll use the blog to record the streak and keep myself accountable. I've tried this before, but that doesn't mean I shouldn't try again. Try, try, until you succeed, right?

Meanwhile, I have a whole new critical voice issue to deal with - submitting for publication, or just publishing stuff myself.

I'm actually writing and finishing stories, and I'm not feeling the need to edit them to death, which is good. I've taken to what Dean Wesley Smith and others call "cycling," which means going back through your writing as you write it and making small corrections and adjustments. Here's how that works.

I'll write until I start to feel fatigued. Now, in the past, that would mean I'd be done for the day, but the contest has me on deadlines, so that wasn't possible. Turns out, that's a good thing. Instead of walking away and doing something else, I take a short break, refresh whatever I'm drinking, and then go back to read the last session's writing, usually about a thousand words, maybe a little more. I fix typos, maybe adjust a sentence or two that doesn't sound right, and within ten minutes or less I'm back to where I left off and ready to resume writing another thousand words or so.

It's a good feeling, and when I'm done with a story, the copy is very clean. I do go back over the whole thing once more, mostly for typos. Last night, the contest story took me about a half hour to do the final run  through, but that was because I had to cut 200 words. Normally, it seems to take me about twice my normal reading speed, so no more than ten minutes per thousand words.

For whatever it's worth, the cutting was not a good feeling, but it probably made the story stronger. Because I was writing to a word limit, there was stuff in the first half of the story that I wanted to use in the second half, but word count limitations dictated otherwise, so most of the words that I cut were things that ended up not being important to the final version. Without the word count limit, it's hard to say if cutting those words would have made sense. There were probably a few spots where I could have tightened up the sentences, but because I felt the word limit crunch towards the end of the story, I left out a lot and stayed strictly on a single conflict resolution. 

I suppose in a short story, narrowing the scope makes the story stronger. It's good practice, and maybe that's why so many writers start learning the craft with short fiction. Being able to only write what is pertinent to the story is a skill in an of itself, and one more easily learned through short fiction, I'd guess.

Anyway, the point is, I'm doing a better job following Heinlein's Rules 2 & 3, "You must finish what you write," and, "You must not edit except to editorial order." I never liked line edits much, anyway. I always prefer to write it well the first time and then cut for clarity, but some old college writing courses had me thinking a line-by-line edit was the most important part of writing the story. There are plenty of authors who spend years editing a single novel. 

No thanks. That's not fun, nor do I feel like it's necessary if you are trying to write well from the get go. If anything, cutting the story down last night felt like I was trying to make it sound like someone else had written it. I was removing parts of what make the story sound like I wrote it, which is to say I was removing my voice in spots purely to meet word count. 

That's probably a bit of an exaggeration, but imagine if you spent twice as much time editing something as you did writing it! You'd be trying to make it so clean that any shred of your voice would be gone almost entirely, which might leave a decent story, but it would sound like anyone could have written it. No thanks. I enjoy the authors I enjoy not because of the plot or even the resolutions they have, but because of the way they develop their characters and the way their writing feels and sounds. You know when you are reading Stephen King or Dean Wesley Smith or J.R.R. Tolkien because they have distinct styles, and editing a story to be "clean" can remove much of that style. I'll pass.

Granted, my style is still developing. I need to focus on Heinlein's Rule #1: "You must write." That's what the streak goal I set today is for. But I also have to start working on Rules # 4 & 5: "You must put your work on the market," and, "You must keep it on the market until it sells."

But first, let me get through a seven day writing and blogging streak. Once that is done, this weekend I will sort out my submission and publication process.

Well, I'm awake now. Time for some coffee and breakfast, followed by a shower. At that point, I'll have an hour or so before I have to leave for work, nd I'll sit down and start this short story that I've false started more times than I can count. By tomorrow, I hope to have the story written and out of my system at last.

Have a good day. See you later.

Another story done and submitted

 All in all, this has been a good start to the year. Tonight I wrote another short story, this one for round two of the NYCMidnight Short Story Contest 2021. I had to cut about 200 words to get in under the 2000 word limit, but I always write long, so cutting 10% wasn't too difficult. I liked the story, which means I enjoyed writing it. I have no idea if its "good" or not, and I'm learning that's okay. 

One of the nice things about short stories in this word count range is that I can write them in one sitting, which leaves me almost no time to worry that they suck and sabotage myself. I'm on a ride for two or three hours and its just fun, and when its done I submit it and forget about it.

For example, when I got the feedback for the round one story last week, I was confused at first because I didn't remember the names of the characters in my story, and the feedback mentioned all of them by name. It took me a few minutes to recall enough of the story for the feedback to be meaningful. That might sound weird, but try to think of what you ate for lunch three months ago. It's almost impossible, assuming you eat something different most days. Writing a story works the same way.

Now, as I mentioned a couple of days ago, I wanted to use this as a kick in the ass to start a new writing streak. Thus, tomorrow morning, I start a new story. I plan to write this story in two days, so my deadline is Tuesday night. Then, on Wednesday, I'm starting a novella that I plan to complete by the end of the month.

Yes, I'm asking a lot of myself. But honestly, I have to shit or get off the pot. If I come in a little late, well, that's not ideal, but its fine as long as I finish the stories and submit or publish them.

Time to unwind with a good book. Early wakeup tomorrow. Have a good one.

Rabbit holes and the eventual resurfacing

Hello, folks. I've been down a couple of rabbit holes the past two months, one for RPGs and another for baseball. Both have involved some writing, but it's pretty normal for me to have writing spurts and then take off on tangents. I'd like to get a regular writing habit, but I always find things to distract me from the task.

You may recall that, back at the end of January, I entered the NYCMidnight short story contest. I had a week to write a 2500 word story to three prompts and submit it for judging. Well, those results just came back, and I'm on to round two! I came in third in my group in round one, and received very favorable feedback. So, tonight at midnight, I'll be give another assignment, but this time I have to write a 2000 word short story in three days! That's not all that bad, really, as I tend to write a pretty clean copy from the get go. I figure I'll wake up in the morning, get my prompts, and take the day to let the story come to me and evolve. Then, on Saturday morning, I'll bang it out and submit it. 

Meanwhile, I decided to address the root of my writing pattern problem. I have written in short spurts for years, and always have trouble finishing longer works, like novels. I always talk myself out of going on after a week or less, and usually because I'm struggling with whether or not the writing is good, or if I'm doing it the right way, or some other thing has distracted me and I've happily let myself enjoy that distraction because I don't want to deal with the negative voice in my head. 

Well, that voice is called the critical voice, and its a dick.

So I signed up for a workshop with Dean Wesley Smith called Killing the Critical Voice. I'm enjoying the first week. I've watched all the videos for this week's introductory lesson, and have my assignment, which I plan to wake up early tomorrow and complete before work. The workshop is a six week program, and I hope that by the end of it, I'll have the tools I need to get out of this two decade long habitual rut and launch myself into a daily writing habit.

Its already paying dividends in terms of my attitude. I took some time today to sketch out a preliminary productivity schedule for the rest of the month and the next twelve months. Lots of great writing ideas that I finally need to sit down and execute. It will all come down to following Heinlein's Rules of Writing and getting my work out there for public consumption. If I can get into a daily habit, stick to my deadlines, and keep on rolling come hell or high water, the next twelve months will be incredibly productive. And this is coming off my best writing year by far.

Long story short, I'm still here, I'm still committed, and I'm trying to learn to come at things a different way. The only way to get new results is to change the approach and method, right?

And yes, I'm trying to get into a nightly blogging routine. If I can just remember what is important and make sure to put it first, then everything else will be so much easier. So, that said, I'll see you tomorrow.